No matter your age, it can be difficult to have full disclosure with your parents, especially if you are preparing to tell them you’re pregnant. It is normal to feel an array of emotions after learning about your pregnancy. But, before you inform anyone of the news, you must first allow yourself to process this information.
Most women realize that they should not stress during their pregnancy. To avoid this, here are a few tips on how to share the news of your pregnancy with your parents:
- Timing: When to Tell Your Parents
Some women believe that the best time to tell their parents that they are pregnant is after dinner, but this is not always the case. A full stomach does not necessarily constitute happiness or understanding. Think about good, not perfect timing. “Make sure that allotment of time gives [everyone] a chance to talk…and say everything [they] need to say. This may be very quick, but it can also take a lot of time for questions, expressing feelings, and instances of silence to process the information.” Consider the work schedule of both of your parents. For instance, a Friday may be the most practical day to deliver the news, if you think your parents may need additional time to process this information.
- Together or Separate?
Every family and their dynamic is different. Consider both of your parents and whether they are together or divorced. Make a conscious decision of whether or not you plan to tell them together or separately. Telling the parent that you believe will be less upset by the news can be a good idea if you plan to tell them separately. This method can also be helpful when telling the more difficult parent, so no one is silenced.
“Some women want the father of the child [or a close friend] with them when they share the news. Others prefer to do this in person but by themselves.” However, the decision is yours to make whether you want to be accompanied or if you prefer to do it alone.
- Plan Ahead With the Location
Make sure you deliver the news in a safe and comfortable setting for yourself and for your parents. Disclosing this information over the phone, while driving can be unsafe. It is also unreasonable to disclose this information while you or your parents are in a professional setting. A public setting is recommended if you feel this information would cause you to be in danger or in an unsafe situation.
- Rehearse What You Plan to Say
This does not have to be a scripted speech, but it is important that you know what you need to say. Don’t beat around the bush, be straight forward and tell them. Don’t assume you know what their reactions will be but rather, lead the conversation with facts and ask for their support. Perhaps, you can start the conversation by saying “I have something important I would like to share with you.” Be prepared to answer questions like: “Who is the father?”, “How far along are you?” and “How did this happen?” Remember it is okay to allow you parents to have feelings of joy, shock, or disappointment if your pregnancy was not planned.
If they are supportive of your decision, embrace it! These insights may help, but expect the unexpected.
If you are pregnant and need assistance, Contact Us!
1. “How Do I Tell My Parents I’m Pregnant?” Adoption, https://adoption.org/tell-parents-im-pregnant. Accessed February 13, 2020.
2. “How Do I Tell My Parents I’m Pregnant?” Women Deserve Better, http://www.womendeservebetter.com/how-do-i-tell-my-parents-im-pregnant. Accessed February 13, 2020.